Ego Vs. Spirit! Whose in Charge?
I'm "off season" right now. That's what my husband calls not working out. I don't believe there has ever been a time in my life that I can remember, where I took this much time off from my fitness routine. Yoga is still in my life, but minimal. My friend is pregnant so, I lost my running buddy. Boxing was cool for about a month, then got sick of it. The same gym with the same people and the same classes...over it. Running, my love of running...don't ask me what happened there.
So, you can see I am kind of in a state of bleh. It kind of feels good though. Like my body is enjoying it, but my mind is not. Mrs. Ego over here is freaking out, because chunkers are forming around my waste and cellulite is popping up in places I was so blessed to never have. "Girl, what are you doing to my body?" I'm flabby now. I feel gross. My clothes do not fit the same way and I am over you sitting on the couch enjoying your dinner watching Downton Abbey. This is not cool and we must stop this right now!" As she is screaming in my ear while I am on Season 4 and loving every minute of it.
Of course, I am going to start my workout routine again. Of course, I am going to get rid of chunk and jiggles, because that is what I do. So, why can't I just chill out for a minute. I am not being unhealthy here. I am eating fairly well, staying active by walking and playing with my dogs and teaching yoga. Clearly, my body has spoken and wants to just be in this state of hibernation from intense workouts. But, here I go again beating myself up for not being on the same side as my mind (EGO). This is what happens when you are aware of how different your spirit is compared to your mind. This is the argument that happens when you know your body is right, but your EGO does not believe it. This is what happens when you live in a state of fear and have Mrs. Ego screaming at you to listen.
She's freaked out because if you don't listen to her then she loses power and goes away.
That, my friends is the reason I am venting over my "no workout" life right now. To guide you towards who is really in charge? Your EGO or your SPIRIT?
Here is a story I want to share with you from Pema Chodron, "When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times."
"Once there was a young warrior. Her teacher told her that she had to do battle with fear. She didn’t want to do that. It seemed too aggressive; it was scary; it seemed unfriendly. But the teacher said she had to do it and gave her the instructions for the battle. The day arrived. The student warrior stood on one side, and fear stood on the other. The warrior was feeling very small, and fear was looking big and wrathful. They both had their weapons. The young warrior roused herself and went toward fear, prostrated three times, and asked, “May I have permission to go into battle with you?” Fear said, “Thank you for showing me so much respect that you ask permission.” Then the young warrior said, “How can I defeat you?” Fear replied, “My weapons are that I talk fast, and I get very close to your face. Then you get completely unnerved, and you do whatever I say. If you don’t do what I tell you, I have no power. You can listen to me, and you can have respect for me. You can even be convinced by me. But if you don’t do what I say, I have no power.” In that way, the student warrior learned how to defeat fear. "
Love & Light,